Short Cuts 1

September 12, 2009

Usamaru Furuya – Viz – 2002 – 2 volumes

This series is composed entirely of one-page gag comics about high school girls.  I had read some of these before in Pulp, and I didn’t think they were particularly funny.  They are almost insulting given the fact that Furuya’s superior gag comic, Palepoli, appears in a couple other books that came out around the same time, but not as a collected volume.   I think Palepoli never appeared as a collected volume because Palepoli is a more conceptual book, and most people probably wouldn’t be entertained at all by it.  Short Cuts has a lot of sex jokes and dick jokes, which will always be funny to a broad range of people.  The one thing they have in common is that they both have Golgo 13 parodies, but Palepoli has the superior parody, so it wins anyway.

Here’s the thing about Short Cuts:  I find myself in a Catch-22-type situation posed by many of the comics in the book.  A good example is one where a girl gives her boyfriend chocolate sculpted in the shape of a limp penis.  She explains that she cast it from her brother, and asks if he likes it.  He says yes to please her, which makes her angry for the obvious reasons.  So he says no, and she gets really upset that he didn’t like her gift.

Do I admit that I liked Short Cuts, and have anyone that knows about the book think I am a horrible, depraved pervert?  Or do I say that the book was terrible and that there’s no way anyone would like it and make a liar out of myself?  Do I like chocolate shaped like genitalia, or do I hate gifts from my significant other?  It can only be one or the other.

And when I say it is full of one-page gag comics about school girls, I mean it.  It is 120 pages of gag comics about school girls.  School girls getting stuck on desert islands with otaku.  Scenarios where old men turn into stuffed animals so that it’s less vulgar when they proposition high school girls that want to go out on paid dates.  Awesome ones where old men alter their school dress code so that their girls will have to wear shirts with faces painted in blood on them, barbed wire, and metal spikes along with the requisite short skirt.  Even the ones starring the artist are about him and school girls.  There are a few anime/manga parodies (Rose of Versailles, Golgo 13, Makoto-chan, Doraemon) that cast the characters as school girls.  My favorite was the Makoto-chan parody, which was horrible, but I have no doubt accurately reflects exactly what that series is like save for the fact Makoto-chan was a high school girl instead of a grade school boy.  I know I will hate that series if I ever read it, but I need to read it anyway.  Also, that comic contained the phrase “bye-o-nara,” which made me laugh really hard and is still making me giggle every time I think of it.

There are also some things in here I will never un-see.  The comic where the girl takes her bra off to reveal a screaming pair of heads that perform oral sex on a man simultaneously, somehow while continuing to scream, will stay with me for some time.

It’s amazing.  Really something special.  An acquired taste for sure, though.

Also, somewhat criminally, this series has end notes that rival Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service in awesomeness.  I didn’t realize this until I had gotten to the end, which in retrospect probably means I’m more of a geek than I’d like to admit since it didn’t occur to me that there might be a little help needed and not everyone would understand that time-traveling kids crawling out of a desk and thanking Nobita was a Doraemon joke.  I just learned that Kaihime Karie is a good example of “Shibuya sound,” something I’ll keep in mind next time I read Detroit Metal City.

2 Responses to “Short Cuts 1”

  1. Sara K. Says:

    “A good example is one where a girl gives her boyfriend chocolate sculpted in the shape of a limp penis.”

    My first thought on reading this was ‘they sell that in the Castro’.

    Since you’re still in Eroica-mode, you can imagine what would happen if Klaus ever had to go to this shop.

  2. Connie Says:

    I don’t know, if it was for a mission, he might endure it. He handled the doll molesting and underwear search well enough. But then again, those are some huge chocolate cookies, and he didn’t hold up all that well when he had to eat chocolate cake not shaped like a penis.

    I like that they have the women torso cookies, too. And mostly just stock regular cookies.

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